Deuteronomy

This book is like winding a spring. Moses' first address of the Israelites in Deuteronomy reviews their time from Egypt to present and begins to wind the spring up. His second address reviews and renews God's laws, bringing the spring in even tighter. Moses' third speech is the unloading of the spring. His farewell address launches Israel into their future in the land that has been promised to them.

Within that big picture are a few details that need highlighting. Moses tells us that God did not choose us because of our strength (7:7). This verse releases two big nasty Truths to romp about through the mental facade of reality that we have so carefully created, leaving our pretty little boxes and compartments decimated. First, God chooses us. No matter how unfair it may seem or how unworthy we feel, it is clear here (and elsewhere) that God does the choosing. Whenever I really commit myself to thinking about this, I can't make any sense of how God's choosing is Just. It seems that one of the foundational principles of His relationship with us is our free-will, but His choosing us seems to be a plain contradiction of that. Maybe He chooses us based on something we choose. So if I choose to obey then He will choose to bless, or something like that. I really don't know. Like I said, decimated.

The second big nasty Truth monster is that God doesn't want us because of what we can do. However the whole Him choosing us thing works, it's not based on our own strengths or abilities. Moses tells Israel that God "...chose you, not because you were more numerous than all peoples, for you were the fewest of all peoples." (7:7 HCSB). God doesn't seem worried about what Israel is able to do for Him. He chose the nation that was "...the fewest of all peoples." We see this Truth again if we peek ahead to Psalm 50:12-15 where God says "If I were hungry, I would not tell you, for the world and everything in it is Mine." (Psalm 50:12 HCSB). God doesn't come to us looking for us to take care of Him. We have not been chosen because of our ability to provide for God. In Psalm 50:14-15 we see the reason for our calling: "Sacrifice a thank offering to God, and pay your vows to the Most High. Call on Me in a day of trouble; I will rescue you, and you will honor Me." Pretty cool stuff.

I also thought that Moses' farewell speech in chapter 30 was worth taking an extra look into. It's an amazing benediction and sets the bar pretty high for all farewell speeches ever if you ask me. You should look into it.

Numbers

I had a big, long, smart sounding post written up for this.

But I can't bring myself to post all that because, honestly, it's really prideful and intentionally complex just to make me seem more wise or in tune with God or something.

The brutal truth is that I'm falling behind in my reading. I'm having a hard time catching back up and the more I force myself to read the more I feel like I'm only reading because I have to.

I did finish reading the book of Numbers today and the parts that I didn't skim over or sulk through were actually pretty interesting. I think it's mostly about God's Faithfulness in preparing and purifying His people.

It takes an interesting and confusing side trip into the life of Balaam and I don't really understand much of what goes on there. Why was God mad at Balaam for going with the officials when He had just told him to go with the officials? Did he do it wrong? Was he not supposed to bring his donkey or his two servants? Had Balaam said something that God didn't tell him to say? Nothing seems to change after God chastises Balaam; he just continues to go with the officials. So what was wrong?

I don't have any answers.

I also don't know how to end this post. It is something of an anomaly for me. I think it's a part of God wanting me to simplify my life. I make things complicated when they aren't and I don't know why. Maybe I have some internal desire for conflict or complexity so I can't accept things that are simple.

I'm really just confused right now. Sorry if this is awkward or disappointing or something negative like that.

I'm gonna go be quiet for a while.

Thanks for putting up with me :)

-Nik.

Leviticus

For those of you who are unfamiliar with Wordle, I used the entire text of Leviticus to create the above word cloud in which larger words appear in the text more often and smaller words less often. This tool is often used to determine the main focus of a text (Biblical or not). Here you can see that the main focus of Leviticus(according to Wordle) is the LORD with our offering coming in second. Now allow me to offer a word cloud of the things I have heard about Leviticus in the past year:

I suppose it goes without saying that Leviticus doesn't receive a very accurate representation these days. You'll notice that the word "homosexual" does not appear in any form in the cloud of the actual text of Leviticus. So why do we focus so heavily on this "theme" of the text (that is, if two mentions can be called a "theme")? Christians like to try to be relevant. This search for relevance will need to be the topic of another blog post some other day, but for now, suffice it to say that we're doing it wrong. We should approach scripture with an open mind, reading it for what it says instead of coming in looking for an answer and cherry-picking that answer out of context. So before you open your Bible to Leviticus to tell your Atheist friend what God says about gays, try reading the whole book first, it's actually not that long. You'll probably find some cool stuff in there that you didn't realize before. For example:

There are two themes that readily stand out in Leviticus. The first is God's Holiness. God tells Moses that His laws are set in place so that the Israelites can be holy, which is desirable because God is Holy. Over and over again God reminds His people of His Holiness and of the fact that He is making them holy through His Law. I grew up thinking that holy meant perfect. A holy person was perfect and they knew it. And they knew that you weren't. It wasn't until recently that I learned that holy just means set apart and it usually implies a purpose. So when God tells the Israelites that He is making them holy, He is telling them that He is setting them apart with a purpose. They are seeking after something different than the people around them. And while their goals are arguably better than those of the people around them, this holiness doesn't mean that the Israelites are themselves better than anyone else. Neither are we.

The second theme that stands out to me in Leviticus is redemption. This theme is a little less obvious than the last one. While holiness is an overarching theme throughout the entire book, redemption is really only focused on in one chapter (25). Without going into too much detail (you really should read it for yourself), the concept of redemption in Leviticus refers to buying something back. For one example, if a man sold another man his home, he could "redeem" it (buy it back) within a year for the full price plus one fifth if he wanted/needed to move back. This historical understanding of redemption serves to enhance our understanding of Christ's work on the cross. We were God's, but our sin separated us from Him. So He came to Earth and died to pay the redemption cost for us. He wanted us back, so He payed for all the sin that separated us from Him (plus one fifth? ;). While that nicely summed up in just a few sentences, this is perhaps one of the most profound events in our history, and shoud be pondered and reflected upon as such.

All this without mention of the Year of Jubilee, skin diseases, sacrificial offerings, or holy festivals. Each of these (except maybe skin diseases) could be their own blog entry!

Exodus

Moses' life was completely transformed by his encounters with God. When he first met with God, Moses was nearly faithless. God told him he would lead and speak but Moses didn't believe he could do it. Even through the plagues, Moses was still at the whims of the Israelites. When they complained to him, he complained to God. When they feared death, he feared death. But somewhere during that process we see Moses transformed to the point where in Chapter 14 he can respond to the people's cry of fear with courage.

(10)As Pharaoh approached, the Israelites looked up and saw the Egyptians coming after them. Then the Israelites were terrified and cried out to the LORD for help. (11)They said to Moses: "Is it because there are no graves in Egypt that you took us to die in the wilderness? What have you done to us by bringing us out of Egypt? (12)Isn't this what we told you in Egypt: Leave us alone so that we may serve the Egyptians? It would have been better for us to serve the Egyptians than to die in the wilderness." (13)But Moses said to the people, "Don't be afraid. Stand firm and see the LORD's salvation He will provide for you today; for the Egyptians you see today, you will never see again. (14)The LORD will fight for you; you must be quiet." (14:10-14 HCSB)

Through the rest of the book, God is raising up His people in His ways. He provides for them (16-17:7) and protects them (17:8-15) and teaches them how to be His people (18:17-23, 20:1-17, 21-23, and others). God also shows the power of His Presence, the wonder of His Holiness, and the fullness of His Glory (19:16-19, 20:18-21, and 33:18-34:35). And among all of this, He builds an intimate relationship with Moses. Moses was able to talk with God "just as a man speaks with his friend" (33:11 HCSB).

It's easy to look at the teaching and the friendship as separate events. Over here, we have the god of the commandments and the law and the statutes. Then, separately, somewhere else, we have the god of relationship and mercy and grace. But we don't have a god. We have God and He has us. He is Loving and Just. He is Jealous and Merciful, Powerful and Graceful. And He is all of these in One (and Three) at once. This is confusing. It makes sense that the world goes crazy when He shows up (19:16-19), He is a lot of Presence to deal with. He is so unlike anything we have ever known or can ever imagine that seeing His face would kill us (33:20). What does that even mean? Seeing God's face? We talk about it a lot. Every so often someone will encourage me or someone around me to "seek God's face." Is that a death wish? What do we expect to find in seeking God's face? I don't think God ever encourages people to seek His face (if I'm wrong, this reading plan will show me that soon enough). Maybe, instead, we should seek His friendship/law (I think we can call that "covenant relationship"). That's what Moses did. He was guided in covenant relationship with God. He was given laws and commandments and friendship time with God and through all of this, Moses' life was completely transformed. In reading through Exodus, that is what I see. I see a people being transformed; being brought out of an old life and into a new life through covenant relationship with YHWH, the One Who Is.

Genesis

I've started a reading plan that takes you through the entire Bible in just 90 days. Initially, this was a really intimidating task, but just a few days in to it and it seems much more achievable. I plan to journal on my reading after every book and I will share some of that journal here for your reading pleasure. These posts should come every few days, so I likely won't have much else to post during this time.

So here it is, the beginning:

These are the stories of men who walked closely with God. Noah, Abraham, Isaac, Jacob and Joseph all had deep relationships with God that determined the course of their lives. They were all distincly human as well. Each of these men had trouble living out their devotion to God and often gave in to the pressures of others, of fear, of pride. Abraham feared the Philistines and lied that Sarah was his sister. Isaac did the same with Rebekah. Jacob deceived Esau, obsessed over Rachel and deceived Laban. Joseph hid his identity from his brothers and treated them unjustly. But these actions are clearly not the things that defined these men. Abraham followed God's guidance all over the region. He received his blessing from God in Isaac, but he was willing to sacrifice Isaac for the Lord. Isaac loved his family and followed God's guidance. Jacob followed God's guidance, settled disputes justly, and blessed his sons. Joseph suffered greatly at the hands of others but stayed close to God all along, even responding to them with love. He served the Lord greatly in Egypt and God used him to provide for the world during the famine.

In this book, I see what it is like to be a man of God. I see myself in Abraham. I see myself in Isaac. I see myself in Jacob and in Joseph. Their stories are mine as well. I see my brokenness beside His providence and my antagonistic will beside His perfect will. No matter how many times I am unfaithful to God, He always remains faithful to me. Even from this beginning, God's same Truth has remained. He does not require perfection of me, He only wants devotion. So I must remain devoted to Him. I will be His people and He will be my God.

Oh Bonhoeffer...

So I'm reading this book called Life Together by an amazing disciple of Christ, Dietrich Bonhoeffer. If you have not heard Bonhoeffer's life story, you should check it out. Despite his apparent relaxed and bespectacled nature* in the photo above, Bonhoeffer's writing is some of the most challenging I have found. It challenges me to to act differently, yes, but it also challenges me at the core of how I think about God. As an example, in the chapter I am currently reading (and I mean currently; the book is open mid-chapter next to me as I type this) about the essential parts of fellowship, Bonhoeffer writes of the reading of scripture:

"[During consecutive reading of Biblical books] A complete reversal occurs. It is not in our life that God's help and presence must still be proved, but rather God's presence and help have been demonstrated for us in the life of Jesus Christ. It is in fact more important for us to know what God did to Israel, to His Son Jesus Christ, than to seek what God intends for us today. The fact that Jesus Christ died is more important than the fact that I shall die, and the fact that Jesus Christ rose from the dead is the sole ground of my hope that I, too, shall be raised on the Last Day. Our salvation is 'external to ourselves.' I find no salvation in my own life history, but only in the history of Jesus Christ. Only he who allows himself to be found in Jesus Christ, in his incarnation, his Cross, and his resurrection, is with God and God with him. " (54)

Earlier in the chapter, he challenges our appetite for small amounts of detail-focused scripture.

"When the practice [of reading a chapter of the Old Testament and at least half a chapter of the New Testament every morning and evening] is first tried, of course, most people will find even this modest measure too much and will offer resistance. It will be objected that it is impossible to take in and retain such an abundance of ideas and associations, that it even shows disrespect to God's Word to read more than one can seriously assimilate. These objections will cause us quite readily to content ourselves again with reading only verses.

...

"Not only the young Christian but also the adult Christian will complain that the Scripture reading is often too long for him and that much therein he does not understand. To this it must be said that for the mature Christian every Scripture reading will be 'too long,' even the shortest one. What does this mean? The Scripture is a whole and every word, every sentence possesses such multiple relationships with the whole that it is impossible always to keep the whole in view when listening to details. It becomes apparent, therefore, that the whole of Scriptures and hence every passage in it as well far surpasses our understanding. It is good for us to be daily reminded of this fact, which again points to Jesus Christ himself, 'in whom are hid all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge' (Col, 2:3). So perhaps one may say that every Scripture reading always has to be somewhat 'too long,' because it is not merely proverbial and practical wisdom but God's revealing Word in Jesus Christ." (51-53)

I guess I haven't really processed this stuff enough to be able to offer any sort of humble wisdom here, but I just thought I should share those quotes. Let them challenge the way you read scripture and the way you think about God and how He reveals His Truth to us. I'm gonna go let my brain stop hurting for a bit.

*I used "bespectacled" just because I think it's a fun word. That is all.

What is it good for?

News is reporting that Osama Bin Laden has been killed tonight. I'm sitting in my bed listening to coverage online and waiting for President Obama to address the nation on the matter. My mind wanders as the news anchors tell us again and again that we will forever remember where we were when we heard this news. Does this make anything okay? How is this good news? Why is an entire country willing to celebrate the death of one man?

I realize the evils that Bin Laden has been responsible for. I understand that he founded the organization that executed the attacks that killed nearly 3,000 people in the US. I am not trying to glorify this man or condone any of his infamous actions. What he has done is horrific and disgusting and truly evil. But I believe in a God that redeems. I believe in a God that came to Earth and died a horrific death on a cross so that we would not have to die for our own evil and so that we can live with Him in heaven and sent His Spirit to live with us here on Earth. This God is bigger than all of our sins. He has Grace and Love for every single person that has ever lived. I can't understand the scope of this Love, how it works with us through all things and constantly draws us back to God.

At this point, I don't have a lot of answers to my own questions, but I refuse to celebrate death. It is bold, to put it kindly, to claim that justice has been served in the killing of an individual. I guess one of the largest underlying questions I have is would God kill for justice? I know that this same Loving and Graceful God is Just and I have read of His Wrath being manifested among people on Earth in the bible. Based on some of this reading, it appears that God does enact Justice through killing. This is another thing about God that I can't understand. Apparently He can work big things out even through killing. But it is still a brash statement to invoke this Justice on our own actions. Again, I have no solid answers here, this is just my thinking and it is subject to change without notice. I would love to hear your thoughts on this matter as well.

From a more practical standpoint, it seems naive to assume that this will make anything better. We have known for some time that Bin Laden has not been heavily involved in the leadership of Al-Qaeda or the Taliban for the past few years. His death will only stir more violence. I'm glad to see the increase in national security, and I will pray for our troops during this chaotic time. It's important to remember that Bin Laden's death will not bring back any of the people whose death he was responsible for.

I guess that's all I've got for now. It will be interesting to see how things continue to unfold.